A Camping Trip With Isak

[colonelcannibal]

 *Ives is enjoying himself tremendously. It's been too long since he went camping, doing so again is a lot of fun--especially with a friend. (The fact that he has a friend is pretty amazing all by itself.) He enjoys pointing things out, and enjoys even more when Isak notices things for himself.*

We can go fishing tomorrow, if you would like? Or just swim, one way or the other.

Comments

[colonelcannibal]

I wish you luck in that endeavor, then.

[isak_cederstrom]

"Ja, tack. It will -- be an interesting thing for my family to go through, for sure."

[colonelcannibal]

Good interesting, bad interesting or just, ah, generally interesting?

[isak_cederstrom]

"To be honest, I am not quite sure yet. I hope it will be -- a relief, of sorts, for all of us to have him gone. It has been a long time to live under his tyranny."

[colonelcannibal]

He sounds like the sort of old man who wants smothering with his pillow.

[isak_cederstrom]

Isak snorts a mix of amusement and bitterness.

"Believe me, we have had that thought many times over between the three of us."

[colonelcannibal]

Then why have none of you done it yet?

[isak_cederstrom]

"Ehm, well. It is mostly wanting to avoid being arrested and charged for murder."

[colonelcannibal]

So don't let anyone know. If he's that old no one should question it.

[isak_cederstrom]

"He is not incredibly old -- he is shy of 70. He is a very, very powerful man in Sweden. I can guarantee you that even if I did not tell anyone, they would investigate and find out. They would immediately suspect foul play. It would not have been the first time his life was threatened. The last time it happened, they apprehended the man within a day."

[colonelcannibal]

That is a shame. I think I might owe him a visit, then; not likely that they'd suspect me, or survive doing so.

[isak_cederstrom]

"If he does not die of his own accord in the upcoming weeks, you will be the first to know. I promise."

[colonelcannibal]

Oh good.

It can be nice to have a monster as a friend, can't it?

[isak_cederstrom]

"It has been nice, for certain."

[colonelcannibal]

I suppose it must be nice, if you're so willing to risk a lovely dinner for one with me. *He takes another bite of the last poor fool to wander through his woods without permission and closes his eyes to savor it better.* How anyone can say no to this I haven't a clue, but more for me I suppose.

[isak_cederstrom]

Isak glanced away at watching the Colonel eat -- not just for the food contents, but for the fact that it felt rude to gawk.

"I think the same when it comes to Kalles Kaviar, but I have learnt that not everyone shares the same palette."

[colonelcannibal]

*He doesn't really mind the staring, but he's hardly enamored of it either, so Isak's aversion just gets a bit of an eyeroll.*

I suppose we'll have to, ah, agree to disagree on that one, then. No point ruining a perfectly good friendship over it, is there now?

[isak_cederstrom]

"Agreed. Everyone likes whatever they like, ja?" Isak looked at the whiskey in his glass. "Sort of a weird question, but do you have a favorite -- part? Like, do legs taste better than arms because of how much muscle is there? Or something like that?"

[colonelcannibal]

Not any one favorite. Cheek and tongue are quite good, ribs are good, hearts are good. Lungs rather depend on how much a person smoked, of course, and liver on how much they drank. Guts are mostly there for sausage casings.

You probably don't want to know the details, really. It would be a shame for you to have nightmares about being in a meat grinder or some such thing, hmm?

[isak_cederstrom]

"I -- do not think I would have those sorts of nightmares. I am afraid my curiosity gets the better of me sometimes, so I cannot help but wonder."

[colonelcannibal]

Curiosity gets the better of us all, and has done so since Adam and Eve ate the apple. A bit unfair of God to make us curious and then punish us for it, don't you think? But I digress.

[isak_cederstrom]

"We know my thoughts on religion and the concept of God," Isak replied with a laugh. "It did always seem very unfair for him to do something like that, though. 'I'll give you the thirst for knowledge, but then punish you if you ever try to attain it.' Seems like an asshole of a god if you ask me."

[colonelcannibal]

Precisely. God must be quite insane, to have done such a thing as that.

Of course he's only gotten worse from there--just look at me, I'm all the proof you need.

[isak_cederstrom]

"There are far worse people than you, Ives," Isak retorted. "Far worse."

[colonelcannibal]

Perhaps, but I've rarely met any. Not that they tend to last long when I do meet them . . .